Bottle o Smoke

"God is killing those soldiers in Iraq.  Blowing them to smithereens in punishment.  Pursuant to his wrath, pursuant to his vengeance, pursuant to his righteousness,” 

-Reverend Phelps on American Solders Killed in Iraq

Just when you think American conservatives have gone far enough, they come out from hiding and…WHAM!    Yesterday I watched at how some religious assholes did something just plain wrong and utterly sick.  Something that when you see it leaves you so baffled you just turn to the person next to you in complete and utter bewilderment and ask, with a stupefied face; “…why?”

I’m talking here about reverend Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist Church has about 100 members.  Together with his members, Reverend Phelps has been preaching the word of the lord as he pickets and protests for those homosexual American Solders who have died in the Iraq War.  His church gained notoriety in the 1990s by picketing the funerals of people who died from AIDS.  He also has a websites www.godhatesgays.com and www.godhatesamerica.com, where he actually has a list of people who are in hell, a few being:

·        “Coretta Scott King is in hell with her husband, Martin Luther King”

·        “Your precious Virginia coal miners are in hell” and I have to add:

·        “Pope John Paul II, the Great Pedophile Pope, is in hell”.

But aside from this, he also likes to make public announcements.  Phelps basically brings his church to the funeral of these deceased solders who were killed in action and together, they taunt the grieving family with signs that say “Fags doom” or God hates your tears”.  They do this in Funerals people…Funerals!  They to this to further state how they feel America is being punished for their liberal view on Homosexuals and allowing them to be in the army.  They do this in front of a grieving family, with no remorse.  And the whole time Reverend Phelps does this, I promise you he is smiling.

All this coming from a man of god.   

Steps are being done to try to restrict these protests but reverend Phelps states that under the constitution, they are not doing anything wrong because of their freedom of speech.  Phelps, 76, a law school graduate, vows to challenge the laws in court and says he’ll win. He says a 90-foot limit is reasonable, but he would sue over anything farther.

"We’re going to get rich off the stuff they’re doing," he says.  "This is finger-lickin’ good."

Revered Phelps:  I want to fight you. 

Seriously, I want to get you into a ring, and beat the living shit out of you, you fucking guy.  I challenge you to a fight, you pathetic, sad, deranged 76-year-old excuse for a preacher.  I challenge you to a duel with swords even, you sick son of a bitch, who actually has the audacity to do what you do, seeing others suffer the loss of a loved one really gets you of, you sick fuck.  Revered Phelps, I slap you across the face with a glove, indicating, again, that I want to fight you, this time with pistols.  You are a waste of space in this earth, everything that comes out of your mouth is not the word of god, it is poison.  I wish you nothing but bad things, and a very, very painful death.   Seriously though, I really do want to fight you. 

Sorry, that was my chance to vent. And I took it.  People say the world is going to hell, and people like revered Phelps believe this is so, with everyone one with a liberal thought in the front of the line.  Some are finally fighting back.  Recently, A group consisting of around 5,000 calling themselves the Patriot Guard Riders is trying to shield mourners from cruel jeers by adherents of a tiny fundamentalist church who picket military funerals. 

“The most important thing we can do is let families know that the nation cares," said Don Woodrick, the biker group’s Kentucky captain. "When a total stranger gets on a motorcycle in the middle of winter and drives 300 miles (480 kilometers) to hold a flag, that makes a powerful statement."

While reading the back-story about the Hutus and the Tutsi tribes in Rwanda, I came across an interesting piece of the Bible.  Check this out:

"Much of  [Anthropologist John Hanning] Speke’s Journal of the Discovery of the Source of the Nile is devoted to descriptions of the physical and moral ugliness of Africa’s "Primitive races", in whose condition he found "a Strikingly existing proof in the holy scriptures".  For his text, Speke took the story in Genesis 9, which tells how Noah, when just six hundred years old and had safely skippered his ark over the flood to dry land, got drunk and passed out naked in his tent.  On Emerging from his oblivion, Noah Learned that his younger son Ham, had seen him naked; that Ham told his brothers Shem and Japheth, of the spectacle, and that Shem and Japheth had, with their backs chastley turned, covered the old man with a garment.  Noah responded by cursing the progeny of Ham’s son, Canaan, saying " A slave of slaves shall he be to his brothers!".  Amid the perplexities of Genesis, this is one of the most enigmatic stories, and it has been subjected to many bewildering interpretations-most notably that Ham was the original black man.  To the gently of the American south, the weird tale of Noah’s Curse justifies slavery, and to Speke and to Speke on his colonial contemporaries it spelled the history of Africa’s People".   
-Philip Gourevitch We Wish to Inform you that we will be killed with our families:  Stories from Rwanda. 

For those of you who do not believe this, check out the bible, I did after reading this.  Its all there:
20And Noah began to be a husbandman, and he planted a vineyard:
21And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent. 
24And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.
25And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren.
26And he said, Blessed be the LORD God of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
27God shall enlarge Japheth, and he shall dwell in the tents of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.

Wow.  Did any of you who guys back home who just read that take that all in?  The Bible…justifies slavery?  iiiiiinteresting.  But then again the Bible has been known to be one of the biggest paradoxes in the history of human origin.  Personally this whole thing seems kind of sketchy, but then again, so are catholic priests who like little altar boys.

While I am Roman Catholic and remain so this day, I cannot help but question the stories we read in the good book.  However, while I do think this passage is a little fucked up, I am not at all surprised by Noah’s behavior in the beginning of this passage, post apocalyptic flood.  He builds himself a fucking Vineyard for god’s sake…a Vineyard (lush).  And how many people were left on earth?  Not that many.  Also, think about it:  The man just saved the remnants of the human race along with most of its seemingly important Animals.  Yeah, He’s kind of a big deal, so EXCUUUSE me if he wants to party down and have a goblet of wine whist overseeing how his harem of Dodo birds flourish (and fast forward a zillion years? where are they now?!  obviously god thought them unworthy of life on earth..must have done something wrong I guess…or was it Darwinism…you decide).  Add the fact that he’s just about 400 or so years old and hasn’t died, its no wonder he passed out naked. 

But to Curse his younger son for telling his brothers that their father is passed out naked and drunk probably mumbling the incoherent nothingness of his "glory days"?  I dunno, seems over the edge that Noah would make Ham’s son the first slave, thus Ham the First Black man, Thus Bible = slavery good thing.     My interpretation?  Man I have no comment, I’m staying as far away from thisas possible…Maybe it was hot…you get hot when you drink wine…summer day, no fan or air conditioner…you gotta take some layers off.  Noah, your son was just trying to help your drunkan ass out right?!!?  Where is the bad thing here, save Noah’s binge drinking?!  Are you trying to tell me that the religiouos reasons why Slavery is a good thing is because Noah Woke up hungover and slighly embarrased of his previous nights behavior?  You’ve got to be fucking me.  At least Say Ham forgot to give his father toast or something…that i can buy. 

I call for the powers-that-be (or you) to please please give me some explanation to this bizarre tale.  Your move.